About Me

50 Ways to Skin a Cat

This terrible and graphic phrase is used to illustrate the idea that there are many ways to get the same result.

Therapy is this way.

You want to address the anxiety you feel? You want to have a more peaceful home? You want to be better connected with your partner? You could address these any number of ways. Therapy is one way.

Therapists use many methods. My hope is to give an over view of my personal approach to the challenges you are facing.

Phase One of Therapy

This phase requires taking a history and identifying what is interfering in your life most (lack of sleep? panic? frequent fighting with family members?).

Often early on, I will offer you education around what is likely occurring to cause you unhappiness. These brief insights are designed to help you find hope and know that what you are experiencing is relatively normal and relief is possible. Many clients express feeling a noticeable level of relief just knowing they are addressing things, and we are working on a plan.

Phase Two of Therapy

We have a plan. I will give you some straightforward exercises to try such as (though not limited to) noting how your body responds throughout the day, how is your breathing, do you have any current coping skills, etc.

I do not ask you to change anything initially; just pay attention and report what you notice back to me. After this, I teach you simple (deceptively simple, I should say) techniques that can give you short-term relief.

I want you to feel better quickly, BUT I also need you to have multiple tools in place so we can move on to the harder work which is figuring out: How did you get here? What can you adjust?

How can you avoid getting into this predicament again? Without the clarity from short-term relief, your brain and body cannot help you answer those questions.

Phase Three of Therapy

We work to answer those tough questions. I am willing to try as many different approaches as I know and you require to get those questions answered. It is my job to stay on top of research and techniques so you can find what works best for who you are and what you want to accomplish in this life.

I am here to guide you through it all. You have the answers and strength, you just need some help and support in getting there.

Final Phase

I wish therapy was magic.

I wish I could tell you exactly when you were going to feel better and that you were never going to hurt again.

Unfortunately, I have no crystal ball or magic wand. That said, I have faith in the work I can do with you. The final phase of therapy is making sure you feel confident in your skills. Your ability to connect, soothe, problem solve, etc.

I have faith in your ability to do all this. If we’ve reached the final phase of therapy, you did the hard work with me–and you have these skills.

Many clients see me consistently for 3-6 months; after that, some move on and I don’t hear from them again. Others like to come check in every month, or every couple of months, to make sure they are staying on track, vent to a neutral third party who knows their history, or just update me because it feels good to share with someone who knows how far you’ve come.

It’s important to note that just because you don’t see yourself able to get to the final phase of therapy you can still benefit from therapy. While I feel the best investment is to commit to the long haul of the work, it’s okay to let me know in phase one that you are not ready for this or that after completing phase two you feel confident enough to take a step back from the work to see how things go without tackling the big scary questions.

This is a voluntary process. I will always respect your decisions and what you think is best for your life. You must live it.

Do keep in mind that stopping without understanding how you got here does often result in eventually ending up in a similar uncomfortable place. This does not mean therapy didn’t work–it just means there is more work to be done.

Please always get the help you need, even if I am not the therapist you think is best for you. I hope you can rest assured that regardless of how this goes, my door will be open to you. If I am not the best therapist for you, I will happily provide you with the contact information for other competent professionals. My goal is for you to feel better even if I’m not the one who gets to work with you.